Old Clothes, Cracked Bottles & Rare Diamonds

I know it seems like the three items in the title have nothing in common, but by the time I'm done, you'll understand a little better.

When my husband and I first got married, he came at me hard about everything. It was like I couldn't catch a break with him no matter what.

He criticized my housekeeping; our home never seemed to be clean enough.

He came at my cooking; there was always a bunch of questions about the meals I prepared and funny looks if he didn't think he would like it.

He even came at my weight. I've always been a big girl, and I was bigger when we met than I was when we got married. 

So, of course, as any human being would, I developed a complex when it came to communicating and doing things for my husband. I was always defensive and in attack mode whenever he decided to open his mouth and "help" me. 

That's his word, not mine. 

I called him a jerk.

But then I thought about it. If I really wanted my marriage to last and be happy doing it, I would have to change my outlook on this thing. I was clear that my husband wasn't going to change, and I couldn't change him. Please believe, I tried for a while. But it didn't work at all. So I decided to seek God to change my heart toward my husband and my marriage. 

And that's where the old clothes, cracked bottles and rare diamonds come in. 

Mark 2:21-22

"He went on,

"No one cuts up a fine silk scarf to 

patch old clothes; you want fabrics that match.

And you don't put your wine in cracked bottles."(MSG)

When you and the Lord make changes to you, you marriage changes. And when God changes something, He doesn't just change it, He makes it new (read Revelation 21:5 when you get a chance). So why would you want to keep old habits in a new marriage?

Old habits + Old Ways= Old Clothes

Crazy thinking + Bad Attitude = Cracked Bottles

New Attitude + New Plan = New Wife = Rare Diamonds

My husband put pressure on me to be different. Not because who I was wasn't good enough, because if I wasn't he wouldn't have asked me to marry him. He came at me the way he did because he wanted to see me better, for him and for myself. He saw how taking care of the house the way I was doing it was stressing me out, so he pressured me to do it in a better way. He came at me about my weight because , even though I was healthy at the time, it may not have always been that way, and he wanted me to be around for a long time. And he came at me about having sex because, well he wanted to have a lot of sex. I don't think that part was for me, but marriage is about give and take.

I was doing some research about diamonds. We all have heard that they are formed from coal that is put under pressure. But did you know that only the rarest and most valuable diamonds withstand the most strenuous pressure? Those colored diamonds that have become so popular? The pinks and purples and blues and greens? They are so precious because they hold up under the hard and longest process. They rarely have flaws once they are mined because all the flaws had been worked out under the pressure. They are the best because they stay in the process until the work has been done. They are held in the highest regard and so expensive and desired because they held up through the work and are worth the wait.

You wouldn't put new silk on an old blanket. You wouldn't put new wine in a cracked bottle. And flawed diamonds aren't worth much. Don't bring old habits and bad attitudes with you when you are in the process of having God transform your marriage. 

If you do, the work that you put in will be worthless and your time will be all in vain. 

So let all things be new and let that pressure make you the rarest diamond...