You Only Have Forever...

The divorce rate in the United States of America is astounding. I read somewhere that the rate for divorce is 45%, which means for every 4 marriages, one ends in divorce. That doesn't even count the marriages that are legally separated or the ones where one spouse just left. That also doesn't count the number of marriages where the couple is together in address only; they live together in theory but their lives are totally separate. This statistic only shows evidence of the number of marriages where a judge has granted a marriage covenant to legally come to an end.
*sigh*
I think what people fail to understand is that marriage is a covenant; a usually formal, solemn, and binding agreement.... To promise. The word "covenant" is both a noun and a verb. So not only is it a thing, it's also an action.

Mark 10:9
"...let no one split apart what God has joined together.” ( NLT)

I've heard this scripture in weddings for as long as I can remember. I don't know about you, but when I heard t before, I always thought about outside influences. Never cheat or let anyone else get into your marriage business. but I never even thought about the fact that I can less up my stuff just as much if not more than other people can.

Matthew 5:33, 34
“You have also heard that our ancestors were told, ‘You must not break your vows; you must carry out the vows you make to the LORD.’ But I say, do not make any vows! Do not say, ‘By heaven!’ because heaven is God’s throne. ( NLT)

I think that blaming problems on others is a natural human response. No matter what part we play in the problem, it's just easier to deflect. But the thing about it is, we are responsible for what part we played and how well or not so well we play it.
When we got married, we didn't just make vows to our husbands; we made vows to ourselves and vows to God. We promised the Lord that we would do everything we can, through sickness and health, for richer or poorer, til death we do part.

Unless you plan on dying soon (and I pray you don't) you have a long life to live between now and death.

I think the reason that divorce rates are so high is because marriage has become a pastime and not a lifetime commitment. We no longer take the vows that we speak out of our very own mouths seriously. We have television shows that are full of ex-wives and adultery, making those lives look glamorous and dramatic when the behind-the-scenes pain is concealed by bright lights, makeup and end-scenes. We no longer want to deal with what's real. We think, hey, I'd its not working, move on to the next one.
 
That's not the right way, ladies.
 
Covenants in the bible were lifelong promises made between God and His people. They made a commitment to him. So did you. You promised you would try as hard as you can for as long as you can to make your marriage the best it can be. You may not be able to control your husband's contribution to your marriage, but you can control yours. No matter what your husband does, unless he's being abusive, you are his wife. You are the one that God created especially for him to hold him up and encourage him. Just because that job gets rough doesn't mean you're supposed to quit; it means that you are supposed to endure until the end. You work to constantly reinvent your relationship with your husband. There are so many different angles to get to what your marriage is. Sometimes you may need to fall back and regroup. Sometimes you may need to come at it strong and fight. And at all times you need to pray and seek God for what to do in your marriage. 
Its your marriage too. If you don't work on it, even if you are the only one doing it, who else will? 

If you are not married, I encourage you to wait until you are ready to dedicate your life to someone. Its no small task. Marriage isn't something that you can go into with the mindset of failure. You can't go into it planning for a separation or divorce. Keep forever on your mind and work toward it. 
And if you are married, remember that you have made the choice to be with someone for the duration. Its up to you to make the best of it. It is your life too.
 
You have a lifetime to become the best friend, helpmeet and lover that you can be. Sure there will be mountains and valleys, but with your husband and God you can accomplish anything.
You can trip, fall, give up, come back, argue, fight, scream and cry...
Just give it all you can.

You only have forever.