How Much Are Your Goodies Worth??? (#WifeWorthy Diaries)

So, I was listening to the radio the other day, and heard something that I thought was worthy of a post. I get inspiration from everywhere, praise God.

Anyway, a young woman was talking about becoming a "Born- Again Virgin". While this did catch my attention, this is not the topic of the post (thank God because I don't agree with it at all). But, the young lady's explanation for the topic of conversation did have me nodding my head.

She was basically talking about how this character had a lot of unsuccessful relationships because she was not paying attention to the type of man that she attracted; her focus was being in love. She would bed all of these losers, convincing herself that they were worthy her time, talent and treasure, only to find out later that she was living a lie. The guy would either use her, cheat on her or break her heart, and, after several (and several more) unsuccessful attempts at love, she "revirginized" herself.

Yes, I know that is not really a word. But if a virgin can be born again, certainly I can make up my own word.

Her interview was short, but it stayed with me for the rest of the day. Even though she was speaking of a fictional character that she will play on television (did I forget to mention that?), I believe that all forms of fiction is based on fact. And the fact of the matter is, too many women are focused on love and finding the right man and getting married before their biological clock falls off the bedside table. We are in search of a high that we will never get if we keep going the way that we are going. You know what happens when drug addicts keep chasing the highest high? They overdose. And, forgive me for being blunt, but you, my dear, are dangerously close to a man overdose, because you've been getting high on the cheap stuff.

Know your value.

Proverbs 31:10

"Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?

She is more precious than rubies."

Okay now, stay with me because I tend to ramble on, but I promise that I have a point.

First of all, hopping from man to man is not of God because the scripture clearly says that a man "finds" his wife. I know you probably hear that a lot, but I want you to really listen to it. Searching for the right man is not being found, its looking for. If you are looking for the you take what you find, not what is worthy of you. God created you and you are extremely valuable; much to valuable to be giving away to every Raheem, Devin and Marquis (or whatever their names are).

Secondly, if your ambition is to be someone's wife, and you're out patrolling for men, you're going about it all wrong. Especially if you are sleeping with all of them. One thing that I did listen to my elders about when I was younger is that no man wants a loose woman. You cannot sleep around and think that's going to be okay with a man that wants to be with you. Besides the fact that sex outside of the confines of marriage is against the will of God for your life, it's dangerous. Sexually transmitted diseases, infections, pregnancy scares... it's too much. I say this phrase a lot, and it may seem a little crass, but I want you to understand the seriousness of my message: Keep it in your pants. It might be hard at first, but you'll get over it. And trust me, when you do abstain from sex, you will weed out the fools and be ready for the one that wants to change your name, not just your underwear.

And lastly, have you checked the retail value of rubies lately? I did a little investigation, and the price od rubies can be gauged between $3,000 and $15,000 a carat, depending on the cut. Now, let me ask you a couple of questions:

*Do you have $3,000 to be throwing around?

*If you did have something worth that much money, would you let everyone put their hands on it or would you put it up for safe keeping?

I think you see where I'm going with this.

God allowed the word "ruby" to be used specifically in this scripture. That's because they were extremely rare and sought after during the time that this passage was written. Not too many people saw red gemstones back then, and hardly anyone owned them but the richest of the rich. You were a wealthy, important, influential man if you had a ruby in your possession.

And the same rings true today.

Value your ruby, ladies. Cherish it. Realize that it's appraisal value is much more than what you have been offered for it. Every scrub doesn't get to touch it. It's not meant to hold several men's fingerprints. Allow God to wipe them all away so your value can be restored to mint condition and you can become someone's treasure.

You need to realize how much your goodies are worth...

Listen to What He's Trying to Tell You!!! (#WifeWorthy Diaries)

 

 

This is one of those "for your own good" posts. It is something that I wish God had brought to my attention about myself, and I really hope it helps you in some way or another....

 

When I first met my husband, after we dated for about a month, he told me that he didn't really want to be in a relationship at that point in his life. But, being the stubborn and head-over-heels type of dummy that I was, I was already in love. Or that's what I thought it was. I was twenty years old and he was just the bee's knees to me. Forget the fact that he had a child and was recently divorced, I only had eyes for him.

 

He told me this more than once, and he had even begun to keep company with other women, but because I was in love (and stupid), I was not in the position to hear or see that he didn't want me. So I pressed him until he thought he did.

 

Oh, what a fool I was.

 

Even after about six years, we got married and had babies, but he didn't change. Nothing, no ring, or certificate, or license, made him a different person. So eventually he left because he wasn't happy. I don't believe it is because I made him unhappy or because I was a bad wife. I believe that it was because he wasn't ready for what I wanted, but he loved me so he wanted to give it to me. It might seem foolish, but I really believed that he loved me; he just didn't want to be married. But you know what?

HE TOLD ME THAT AND I DIDN'T LISTEN!!!

Matthew 11:15

"Anyone with ears to hear should listen and understand!"

 

 

Have you ever heard that saying "God gave us two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak"? Yeah, well, I heard him, but I blew him off. Who would not want to be in love? Who wouldn't want someone to care about them and take care of them? That's the way that I thought about it. I have always loved love and I have always wanted to be in love. That's just the way that I am. God created me to be a loving person but, because I wasn't using the love the correct way, I kept getting hurt.

 

I notice this pattern in a lot of women. They find a man and sink their nails into him, thinking that if they hold on to him hard enough, he won't leave. They have babies, fight other women and do all other sorts of foolery to try to make him see that she is the one that he wants.

 

But hunni, if he wants to leave, your nails aren't strong enough to keep him.

 

When my husband left and I decided to start dating again, God showed me this same pattern in myself. I had been healed of some things, but not others. I met someone that I really liked and we began spending time together. Even though I decided "pre-him" that I would live my life celibate, I still began having feelings for him because we spent a lot of time together. Then he told me he wasn't ready for a relationship, and I almost didn't listen.  But I thank God that He used this particular man to show me that I still had a co-dependent spirit in my life. I told him I understood and it was fine if we stopped seeing each other.

 

My spirit-man is more important than any other man.

One thing that I know about men is that they will tell you what is on their minds, whether it be in actual words or in behavior. You just have to make yourself listen! Don't be blinded by the thought of love or the false feelings of lust to the point that you are compromising yourself and your heart for a dude. If that one crossed your path, God will send another one .

 

Do me a favor, and think about the guy(s) that are in your life that you really like. He might even be your boyfriend or fiancée. Think about the conversations you all have had. Has he told you anything about himself that you just didn't listen to? Has he told you that he's not ready for a serious  relationship? Has he hinted around the fact that he wants to see other people? Don't waste time analyzing when you can spend time listening. He will tell you everything you want to know.

 

Ears are more than just holders for fab earrings, hunni....