The Case of the Super Bad Impression....

BTW, doesn't this title sound like a fab book title???
Anyhoo...
Am I the only person that has noticed that, when the paparazzi posts pics of celebrities and politicians, they seem to be the most unflattering pictures that could ever possibly be taken?
Even when a regular human being posts a video on YouTube, it seems like the site or it's editors pic the worst slide to make that video's profile post. It is a horrible ploy to get consumers to buy magazines and/or click website links in order to see what is going on in these famous individuals' lives that they could possibly be caught in the most unflattering manner possible...
And for me, it usually works.
I click the links every time! I fall for the advertisement that wants to poor a negative connotation onto an already famous, unsuspecting victim. Those tabloid covers make you pause and think "could that be true???"
They seem to conveniently  glaze over the good deeds that these people do and the positive attributes about their lives and careers to show the mess. Because, the mess is what people remember. The mess is what will be talked about on the blogs and the magazine covers, and on the talk shows and news feed. It's the foolishness and tomfoolery, the mistakes and the mishaps, that are emphasized and magnified. Always the bad, never the good. And most time, the majority rules; bad decision equals bad person. Judges and jurors everywhere.
But you know what? The public wouldn't find out if the person did say or show it.
How does this apply to you, you say? Well hunni, if your family/friends have a bad impression about your husband, you ma'am are the camera-flashing paparazzi...

Ephesians 4:29

"Don't use foul or abusive language.

Let everything you say be good and helpful,

So that your words will be an encouragement

To those who hear them."

 

Let me just say, I am all about talking to your most trusted friends/family to gain perspective about the things you may have going on. After all, sometimes it takes the ones that know you best to tell you if you are really wrong. I have a group of trusted advisors myself.

(Shout out to the "Cup Girls" and the Right Reverent BFF...)

However, talking to your friends to gain trusted insight on important issues and gossiping with your home girls are 2 totally different things.

There are a few signals that you can use to help you understand if you should be sharing these things with others or not:

-Did I pray about it first?

-Has this person/these people ever been jealous of me?
-Have they ever been married/in a serious relationship?
-Can I say this in front of my husband?

-Am I talking negatively about him, not the situation?

-Are my friends/family wise?

We ask ourselves these questions first so we can know whether we have there green light to go on and talk. We can't just go discussing our marriages with no plan. It's reckless and has the prospective to be damaging to the relationship you and your husband share.

I don't know about your man, but mine HATED when I talked to my friends about us. He said we should keep our business private.

I both agreed and disagreed.

I agreed because I believe in compromise. If I wanted a happy husband and a happy life, I had to yield on some things, and sorry, my friends are not more important than my husband. I will not lose my husband over a few girlfriends, no matter how far we go back.

However, on the other hand, sometimes you need to hear an objective ear. And no one knows you better than the BFFs.

The bottom line is, talking about your husband, even with your most trusted loves, has the potential to sew seeds of discord between you and he, even if he never finds out. And the enemy does this without your knowledge and/or permission! The devil would like nothing more than to destroy your marriage, because destroying a marriage destroys families and destroying families destroys society, thereby giving him access to souls to take to hell with him.

Deep stuff...

And we don't need any more problems.

Also, talking about your man negatively casts shadows. So when they see him, not only do they see the problem, but they are looking directly at the one who hurt their friend.

And if you cup girls are like mine, the shade will definitely be real when they see your husband.

We stick together over here...

And PPS, you never know who is learning and listening. Someone may look to Yu for encouragement in their own marriage/relationship. You don't want to be one of the reasons someone chooses not to marry because of the negative light you're spreading on marriage.

So, please think twice about the bad pics that you choose to share with your girls.

Some of them will never be erased....