Let It All Hang Out... or Nah???

 

Let's talk about inhibitions and privacy.

Do you and your husband have any boundaries? Or are you just free and flowing with each other?

My husband is very self-confident. He has no issues with body image or self-confidence. As a matter of fact, he is the most confident person that I know. Without being to graphic, he has no problems being "bare" about anything. As far as he's concerned, I'm invisible when he has "business" to take care of.

I, on the other hand, am one of the most modest people on the planet. It probably has a lot to with the way that I feel about myself; I battle against self-esteem and  body/image issues. But I personally believe in the concept of personal space and privacy. Everyone is entitled to their own space, right?

Well, this got me to thinking. Is it okay to keep some things personal to you, or do you feel the need to include your husband in every, single part of your life? How much is too much? What if you have privacy issues and your husband doesn't? Does that present a problem?

When we have questions, I'm so glad that we know where to go for the answers.

 

Judges 3:24-25

"When he had gone, the servants came,

And when they saw that the doors of the roof

Were locked, they thought,

'Surely he is relieving himself

In the closet of the cool chamber.'

And they waited  till they were embarrassed.

But when he still did not open

The doers of the roof chamber,

They took the key and opened them,

And there lay their lord dead on the floor."

 

The Bible doesn't say too much about privacy. As a matter of fact, this is the only scripture that discusses anything close to it. The gist of the story is, someone came and assassinated a man named Ehud, but no one knew he was dead until much later because his servants were afraid to enter his chambers. He must have been a man that was serious about his privacy.

FYI, cool chamber is Old Testament-speak for bathroom or toilet.

The point I'm trying to make is that, you have to do what is comfortable for you. If you aren't comfortable going to the bathroom or passing gas in front of your husband, that's your preference. You may find that you are extremely uncomfortable though. That type of privacy isn't really privacy at all; it's fear. My husband once told me that he thought I didn't trust him because I preferred bathe and dress alone. I had pushed out four babies in his sight, but wouldn't undress in his presence. I felt bad, and had to do some self-evaluating. And if you are afraid of what your husband will do or say, your issue is deeper than a personal space issue.

I learned long ago that confidence isn't only attractive; it's sexy. His level of self-confidence is something that I find really attractive about my husband. And once, he made it clear that my lack of confidence within myself not only made him uncomfortable, but made him feel like I didn't trust him. I had no intention on letting such behaviors interfere with our relationship, so I made myself comfortable. I allowed myself to be vulnerable in my husband's presence on purpose. I acted confident until I became more confident.

I faked it until I made it.

I am all about personal space. I believe that everyone is entitled to a little alone time. It's needed. We're married and professed to share the rest of our entire lives with our husbands. For most, that's a long time! We have years and years and years of being together.

Let me use the cool chamber alone, thank you...