Fifty Shades of Grey-Inspired Insane...

I consider myself a connoisseur of books. I will read almost anything, really. My family makes fun of me because I'm known to peruse the back of disinfectant cans.
Nothing is off limits around me.
And, much like you, I've been hearing many things about this "Fifty Shades of Grey". I intentionally stayed away from it because if things that I have heard about it. This particular literary work was not on my radar, but after conversing with another book expert, I decided to stop judging the book by its reputation and indulge... For the lack of a better term.
Well...
It wasn't horrible. I was expecting an old-school porn, story line-lacking, chapter after chapter of eroticism. I was wrong. There was paragraph after paragraph of graphic sex acts that made even this Insane Wife blush, but the basis of the story was fascinating. Without going into too much detail, "Fifty Shades of Grey" is about a young, inexperienced woman who falls in love with a deeply disturbed young man who has an obsession with being overly controlling.
 What I found particularly interesting is that the leading man had a standing contract with any woman he "dated". Outside of  a standard non-disclosure form, there were extremely specific areas the their prospective "relationship" that he wanted to be made clear. What was expected of him as well as what would be expected of the female counterpart.
Genius...
So this got me to thinking about boundaries. I know that they are needed before marriage, but what happens afterward? Do the boundaries magically disappear? Do we take the time to modify the premarital boundaries? Are there still things that are off limits, physically? Financially? Emotionally? Or do we just leave our lives open to be lingered into here and there?
Hmmm....

Genesis 3:1-4

"Now the serpent was more crafty than

any of the wild animals the Lord God made.

He said to the woman, 'Did God really say, 

'You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?

The woman said to the serpent,

'We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,

but God did say,

'You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in 

the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it,

or you will die.'

'You will not certainly die,'

the serpent said to the woman."

See? Boundaries, even waaay before when.

I'm not saying that there has to be a typed and double-spaced contractual document. But maybe having the discussion is a good idea. One reason being, so you both will know what is and isn't okay. It keeps down the riffraff. Clarity. Not just, we're faithful to each other and we split all the bills down the middle. I mean real conversations. Doing this will keep your feelings from getting hurt and your husband from trying to read your mind and figure out whats wrong.

Do you expect to have a date night? How often?

Will you maintain control of any portion of the finances? Will you have your own bank account?

Will needs of the children be exclusively your responsibility or shared?

Are we given access to emails, cell phones and mail?
Even intimacy. What's welcomed? What's off limits? 

We have to talk about these things. 

Like I say often, marriage isn't forever; its til death. Who wants to spend that time upset because we could have made things clear but didn't?

Fifty Shades of Grey taught this wife a lesson. Do you have boundaries?

There has to be a line drawn somewhere...

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