Green Grass, Crab Grass & Astroturf

I hate the phrase "The grass is always greener on the other side". If we are truly dedicated to our husbands and our families, we could care less about what's on the other side of our fence. We've got our own yards to maintain! Why care about someone else's grass? They might have to do more to theirs to keep it looking nice. In other words, you never know how much it takes to build a relationship with another person. You are already in the building process! While you are taking your husband for granted and allowing the personality clashes that you have to overtake the overall vision that you have for your marriage, you're allowing the quality of your own grass (your marriage) deteriorate. Once you start letting your mind wander, your eyes will start to wander and the enemy will begin planting ideas in your mind that will cause other body parts to wander, too.

1 Thessalonians 4:11

"And to aspire to live quietly, 

and to mind your own affairs, 

and to work with your hands,

as we have instructed you..."(ESV)

Since we are minding our own business, let's maintain our own grass. Do you know what kind of grass you have? Keep reading and maybe you'll see your marriage in one of the descriptions below.

~Green grass represents a good, healthy marriage. When grass is healthy, it is plush and soft, like expensive carpet. It not only looks good, but it feels good. It has a clean, crisp scent and healthy roots. Healthy grass is healthy because it is well maintained. It is watered, cut and kept up. A healthy marriage is the same way: well-maintained. It is taken care of by both caretakers. Your marriage becomes healthy when you are both dedicated to making your marriage the best marriage it can be, and you constantly seek God to apply His principles to your lives, individually and collectively.

~Crab grass looks like healthy grass, but it isn't. Its makeup has been compromised. Its green, but its unruly. Its growing, but it doesn't grow together or evenly like healthy grass; some parts of it grow quickly, some parts grow slowly, which makes it uneven. Its hard to the touch and, because of its uneven growing, its hard to maintain. If it isn't taken care of, the crab grass will eventually effect the health of the green, healthy grass.  This is a kind of marriage that started off healthy, but isn't well maintained. The husband and wife aren't on the same page or working toward the same goal. Maybe its because they don't even have a goal. Maybe they have goals. but they aren't working on them together. This is what is happening when couples feel as though they have grown apart. They fell separated, so they start living their lives separate. And eventually, the grass dies, and the marriage ends in divorce.
~Astroturf is the kind of grass that is used in some sports arenas. It gives the illusion of grass, but its really only carpet. Its doesn't need watering or cutting. It doesn't get fed or maintained. Once its laid, its there; its fake. It doesn't grow There is nothing real about it. There are no roots, no scent, no nothing. This marriage is a sham, just like the grass. The husband and wife are marriage, but in theory only. They are totally separate and probably think that they no longer have hope for their relationship. They don't even pray about their marriage or for each other. Not a good place.
If you have green grass, praise God! Let's continue to make it stay that way.
If you can compare your covenant to crab grass or astroturf, we have some work to do. But take heart, there is still hope. I would encourage you to, first, seek the Lord for what He wants you to do. Never make divorce your option, whether it be a first one or a last one. While you are waiting for the Ultimate Counselor to have His way, do what you are suppose to do as a wife. Never stop praying or working. Never give up. And never compare yourself to another couple. Never take your eyes off your own marriage. Don't start peeping over fences and hedges.
Do you know what kind of grass you have? Good! The good thing about this is crab grass and astroturf can be overhauled. They can be torn up and replaced with the real deal. It will take work, you may sweat and you may be sore in the morning, but when you step back and look at it, you will see the progress, and its worth the work.
Tend to your own grass! Take care of your own lawn! Mind your own, personal business. Take care of your home, your family and your man.
Because, in reality, the grass is greener when you take care of it...